Well, it is unusual for me to write at the office as I am usually busy talking with my fellow teachers and planning the lesson. Today is different, though. I am pretty happy that I have free time and I can use it to write.
So, I only have a class today, my morning class. I am free afterwards until the last bell rings. My partners, Iki and Anggi, are taking their days off today mostly for the proposal consultation reason. It is true that we are all busy and such in a rush to get our proposals accepted this week. Alas for me though, I still have to go to the school because I have one class to teach. I will also see my adviser later in the afternoon. I decide to go home early around 1 p.m. today, so I can arrive on campus in time. I also do not have many things to do after all.
Anyway, I have always wanted to spend my free time here at the office writing my blog. Writing always relaxes me and cheers me up. It is a total therapy for me. However, I seem do not have much free time to really sit and write. I am so tight up with the routines which include teaching and doing my proposal. I now only manage to write on the weekend which is fine but not enough for me who proudly claims myself as an aspiring writer. Finally, after such a long delay, I can write on my free time at the office. I also happen to take my laptop with me, and yes, for the sake of revision.
Well, today is a fine day, another regular teaching day, but last night was terrible. I finished doing my proposal around 1 a.m. and then continued preparing my teaching for today. All in all, I finished them all around 2 a.m. I planned not to sleep actually, because I was afraid of waking up late and ruining today. I could not fight the drowsiness though. I gave up and I fell asleep fast. I could not sleep well – I kept waking up several times, checking my clock, and making sure I woke up as planned. It was horrible – one of my restless nights ever. I hate the feeling, you know, being anxious and tired all at the same time. I hate deadlines too. I basically hate everything at that point.
I am thankful that the rough night was finally over. The proposal was good and the teaching preparation was good too. What left from last night was the drowsiness and the zombie-like feeling that I took with me today. I was not in the good mood at first, but I got better soon. I successfully pulled myself out from my comfortable bed and set off to school. I now learn to deal with my reality gracefully.
Being a teacher myself, I now learn how tiring the job is. I know that at some points, the job is very rewarding emotionally, psychologically, and religiously, but it is also exhausting at times. I miss my free time, my eight hours sleep, my comfort. I know that I should not have to whine like this, but yes, I feel like whining a lot these days.
So, that is all for now. I will make sure that my next writing will be more informative and scientific than this whining thing. Well, let us see.